If no one else is going to talk about these things, I am going to. This blog is well on its way to being the number one half-Asian resource on the internet. Any commenters here would be smart to stick around. “Suck it up,” and “he’s hot” comments don’t work in reality.
The majority of people on this blog claim that their wives / girlfriends / mothers weren’t looking for white men. Yet the fact remains that this is the most common interracial pairing, bar none. And the resulting children look Asian. So either I am lying, or someone else is lying. I am not lying, because I know for fact, from my father’s mouth, that my mother threw myself at him because he was white.
The result is that among these millions of children born, ideally the maximal potential for their abilities should be achieved, but since their own parents dictated to them that race matters, and that Asian men were inferior to white men, the potential for burning out is massive, especially as they get older and “sexual preferences” become more of an issue past childhood.
There is little that would ever convince me to be a good, upstanding, or productive citizen if I found out that my own mother preferred white men. What kind of horror would this amount to if a child caught wind of this – that ones own mother hated Asianness, and Asian men – the ones capable of producing full Asian children – yet producing a half Asian son?
Anyone who has ever known more than one Hapa would attest to this.
Anyways, morsels of wisdom from /r/Hapas, the only real community of Eurasians on the internet, one growing daily and destined to become a massive collective think tank for all Hapa / Eurasian / half-Asian issues.
The reason WMAF Asian mothers fail, is not because of what they say, but what they do. No matter how much they claim to value Asian activism, their “revealed preferences” for white men, en masse, on a scale unlike any other race of women, is the ONLY true message they send to their Half Asian sons.
More from him, regarding this New York Times article from this week about biracialism:
mtzoWM/AW Son 7 points1 day ago
Coming from her position, it would be “problematic” for her to ever directly challenge the choices of Asian women, as bluntly as we do at [here].
But she is definitely hinting at some of our points. She brings up that Eurasian boys might seek to be white, at the very young age of 5; because of all the anti-Asian racism. She also calls out the hypocrisy of a WMAF Asian woman judging a 5 year old boy for his Asian shame. In context “As a child, I most wanted to fit in.” points to the Asian mother wanting to be “normal” (read white). And so the author is at least gingerly hinting at the Asian mother contributing to the valuing of whiteness, and then judging her son for seeking the very thing she values. It just shows that the r/Hapas position is not as “crazy” as our critics made it out to be a few months ago, and is even gaining traction among the Hapa Establishment, from leading figures within mixed race feminism and social justice.
More from him;
There are numerous articles written by Asian moms about wanting to preserve the Asian side of their Hapa sons. The problem is that, these Hapas are not feeling shame about their Asian side for no reason. And the plain fact is, these Asian moms might very will be prime contributors to Asian shaming, by making their outmarriage and racial preferences known in such huge numbers. It is impossible to look at outmarriage in such monumental numbers and not interpret it as a judgement against Asian and Half Asian men. And many Asian women are quite open in saying it.
I don’t believe Hapas should try to pretend they are white. I believe it is a strategy doomed to fail. But I can certainly understand why at age 5, a Hapa would think being an Asian boy is something to run away from. The Asian mom acts so shocked and horrified by it. Not realizing that the millions of women like her ARE making being an Asian boy something to be ashamed of. To put it bluntly as long as WMAF remains so imbalanced, and on a scale unlike any other race of women, Hapa boys WILL be ashamed to be Asian. Some might come to hate WMAF for emasculating them. While others will go in the other extreme direction of becoming White Nationalists to prove their whiteness. Asian women are making Asianess something to be ashamed of in their sons.
Tsui writes about when she was younger she wanted to “fit in”. If we flesh out the real meaning of these sentiments, it probably means that she wasn’t a “real American” because she was Asia. Now that she has a white husband shes “normal”. And of course her Half white son also wants to be normal. His mom is Chinese, but hes not. I believe that the bloggers was at least softly chiding Tsui on some of these exact points.
His particularly chilling comment:
Perhaps Tsui as an individual is sincere yet problematic. My personal belief is that being a WMAF Hapa son, can’t be separated from the nature of actually existing WMAF. In which it carries a ton of racial and gender baggage, and is happening in such a manner as that a Half Asian boy would have legitimate reasons to feel shame at being an Asian boy.
From user “Bestofbothworlds2”
It’s nice to see a hapa speak out for us and criticize these (always Asian) mothers who insist on speaking for their children while they are too young to disagree. These (until recently) were the only hapa narratives that ever seemed to get any readership. Funnily enough, when their children grow up and have voices of their own, their words are rarely so self-serving.
It annoys me when parents extol the virtues of being mixed race and ramble about how they are doing the world a service, making it more color blind. Further fragmenting a community that is already as fragmented as the Asian-American community is is not doing anyone a service except the Asian women who leave it and the white men they inevitably marry. Interracial marriage does NOT make for better race relations unless a majority percent of the population is very open to them, and with all races and genders in equal measure. If this is not the case, it may even make existing race relations worse.
Being hapa in many ways is trading undiluted Asianness – the languages, the cultures, having a huge part of the world that belongs to people like you, and everything that entails – for white DNA. Is it worth it?
Ultimately the hope is that we would never have had issues with it. For twenty years Asian women and white men prayed fervently that these issues would never be revealed as being less than innocuous. And given that there are so many hapas coming here agreeing and yet a number who just plug their ears and scream “no it’s not true!” reveals in actuality that these women do indeed wish that asianness be subverted without any collateral damage.
Now that the collateral damage is happening, they are quickly backtracking on their hatred.